Manipulation is a dirty word today. In modern usage, it’s implied that whenever something is being manipulated, its done so for insidious reasons. Who wants to be used for someone else’s purposes, which may not be to your benefit? (The answer is no one.) The redefining of the verb “to manipulate” into something that’s morally/ethically wrong is where the confusion lies.

Game is nothing more and nothing less than manipulating a woman into liking you and wanting to sleep with you. Men use Game (or Charisma, if you prefer) to make themselves more attractive to women; likewise, women use make-up and flattering clothing to make themselves more attractive men. That’s the way it’s always been.

In the time before the Sexual Revolution, there was no “Game.” Men were men and women were women, and they loved each other for it and had no problems interacting with one another. The culture of the times was different. The words we use today are different, but the ideas are the same, even if Game is largely used today by PUA’s for fast n’ easy sex.

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Now, when it comes to Game, confidence and charisma are foundational, but unless these qualities are reflected in your behavior, most women will not find you attractive at all. There is nothing in Game that demands it be used for anyone’s benefit but the PUA’s. Confidence doesn’t even need to be real, it can be faked and still be as successful as the real thing.

And that’s the heart of the matter: that a man could lie his way into a woman’s heart, that he could use her for his own ends and nothing more, and that statements of love could be faked.

Here’s a secret we learned years ago in Sunday school: people are bad and do bad things. It’s in our fallen nature. It’s not fair, but fair’s got nothing to do with it. It’s mankind’s default behavior pattern and, unsurprisingly, most people embrace it with abandon. Easy, no-strings-attached sex is a worldly man’s dream. Game does not teach morality, it teaches behavior and attitude. How it’s used is up to the PUA himself.

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Is it manipulative of a man to swagger into a bar and talk to an attractive woman, his end goal being to bring her home and sleep with her? Yes, it is, but that’s not what should concern the average, indoctrinated co-ed. What should is the fact that she falls for it so reliably well whether its real or not because she’s been told all her life by modern culture that it’s okay to sleep around. A man does not have to make any pretenses about wanting a relationship today for a young woman to sleep with him; she’ll usually put out if he’s sufficiently charismatic and can spark enough intrigue to make her attracted to him. No deception necessary, only attitude changes. All he has to do is talk and move right to get what he wants. Only in the most bastardized rendering of the word can this be considered “manipulation.”

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But let’s flip the set for a moment: is it manipulative of a woman to cover her face with make-up and wear a push-up bra to make herself more attractive? Yes, it is. Is it wrong? No, it’s not. Women want to look pretty, and there is nothing wrong with that. Men are attracted to beauty, always have been, and always will be. Men are “manipulated” into liking a pretty woman with make-up because of the nature of what men find attractive. Women are “manipulated” into liking charismatic, strong men because of the nature of what women find attractive. Men and women can certainly fake it, but there is no manipulation or deception necessary in making either of the sexes attracted to what they’re biologically programmed towards. It comes naturally.

Manipulation is a two-way street and a morally neutral concept. We manipulate others everyday, whether it’s asking for a favor, changing our clothes, arguing our side in a debate, or simply using a new deodorant. We all want others to think we’re better than we really are or to do something for us if we need a favor, because we all want to be liked, admired, and helped in times of need.

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A PUA wants easy sex, so he changes his behavior to get it. From a secular perspective, there is nothing wrong with this: he did not rape her or coerce her into having sex and he probably said nothing about wanting a relationship. Is that manipulation? Yes. Is it wrong? That depends on who you ask